Calamity Jane Lists Pacific Smelt

Lunatic NOAA Admin Jane Lysenko freaked out and put the common Pacific smelt on the Endangered Species last week.

You ask, can Calamity Jane do such a thing? The answer is yes. Only in America, and only when the Commies run the zoo, but yes, yes they can.

The common, abundant Pacific smelt was listed as “threatened” on March 16th by the National Marine Fisheries Service (NMS), a vassal sub-sect of NOAA [here].

[T]he ESA requires federal agencies to ensure that activities they authorize, fund or conduct are not likely to jeopardize the continued existence of a listed species. Prohibitions against harming them would apply only to Pacific smelt in U.S. waters or to U.S. citizens on the high seas, even though the population extends into Canada.

No more smelt dipping under penalty of 5 to life in Leavenworth. The super-abundant, NMS-protected sea lions can have all they want however.

The Pacific smelt or eulachon (Thaleichthys pacificus) is abundant, has high fecundity, and a demonstrated ability to rebound from periods of low abundance. Even the smelt-brains at NMS know that. But the facts don’t matter with “our” feral gooberment.

The NMS created a “distinct population segment” out of thin air, declared it in danger of going extinct, and slapped a new Law of the Land on an astounded human population, caught unaware and blindsided by the smelt-brains.

The NMS also declared that “climate change… is likely the most serious threat to persistence of eulachon” [here]

There is evidence that climate change is leading to relatively rapid changes in both marine and freshwater environmental conditions that could impact eulachon. Marine, estuarine, and freshwater habitat in the Pacific Northwest has been influenced by climate change over the past 50–100 years and global patterns suggest the long-term trend is for a warmer, less productive ocean regime in the California Current and the Transitional Pacific. Climate-driven changes in stream flow timing and intensity in this area have also occurred and are likely to continue (Morrison et al., 2002; Pickard and Marmorek, 2007; DFO, 2008).

Except that… the climate hasn’t changed and isn’t going to change, no matter how much the Kool-aid drinking Alarmobots shake, rattle and pull their hair out.

Climate change is dead. The hoax is over. But Calamity Jane and the NMS are still hard at it, like Nigerian emailers. And now the hoax is the Law of the Land. That’s what we get for hiring complete frauds and shysters as public servants.

One result you can expect: the entire Pacific shrimp fishery will be shut down.

Management actions that may be taken by DFO include: closing the entire shrimp trawl fishery.

Why? Because of the bycatch. It seems that when shrimp trawlers net shrimp, scads of smelt end up in the nets, too.

In Oregon shrimp fisheries, the bycatch of various species of smelt (including eulachon) has been as high as 28 percent of the total catch weight (Hannah and Jones, 2007).

See if you follow the NMS reasoning. The Pacific smelt is going extinct. The population is down to next to nothing. Except where the shrimp are, and then the smelt are nearly as abundant as shrimp, accounting for 28 percent of the total catch by weight.

So there are gazillions of smelt, and they breed like flies, but they are going extinct due to gloooobal waaaaarming (play the Twilight Zone theme here).

Oh yes, and the dams, too. It’s those damn dams that are extinctifying the smelt. Gotta get rid of the dams. Blow the dams to bits. That’s the Obama-Lysenko policy.

The development and operation of the Federal Columbia River Power System (FCRPS) and Bureau of Reclamation irrigation projects in the Columbia River basin have altered the hydrology of this river system. We have worked with the USACE, Bonneville Power Administration, and Bureau of Reclamation to develop mitigation measures to minimize the adverse effects of these projects… Since eulachon are known to be plentiful in systems with a strong spring freshet, releasing additional water in the spring… is likely to move the hydrograph of the Columbia River to a state more similar to that under which eulachon evolved.

Ms. Lysenko, move that hydrograph!!!!

What ought to be moved is the feral gooberment, to China, where they will fit right in.

That’s the ticket. We ought to identify a Distinct Population Segment: feral gooberment employees, and move them to China. Ship the entire public sector workforce to a foreign country and leave them their and don’t let them back in no matter how much they beg and plead. We don’t need them, don’t want them, they are anti-social and cause too much destruction and disaster, and we would be far far better off without them.

Endangered smelt! What a joke. What a fraud. What an obscenity of putrid, offensive government out of control.

24 Mar 2010, 7:38pm
by Johnnie


Really now, you need to consider your argumentative approach. Ad hominems are rarely effective in persuading anyone. I was surprised at the listing, too, but unfortunately there’s no rational analysis in your essay - just foam-at-the-mouf ramblings and juvenile phrases(’gooberment’ - how charming. Better than ‘gubmint’, I suppose).

24 Mar 2010, 9:32pm
by Mike


Your are right Johnnie. I am in a lot of pain today from bursitis in my elbow. Typing is difficult. My mood is sour.

But on the other hand, what analysis is there? The listing is one more incremental step in destroying the economy for NO GOOD REASON. Pacific smelt are not endangered, by the NMS’s own admission. So what is the point of inflicting more pain when the economy is already in shambles?

Can you answer me that?

And what is the polite approach to another twist of the knife from out-and-out frauds and bounders? Is there a polite approach? Why don’t you write it up for us all to consider.

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